Friday, July 10, 2009

Now what Schiller - The Nightmare


Feinin-Hermes - The Nightmare - Henry Fuseli c 1781

I got it bad, I got it right yesterday, I felt it in my gut. God, things to do, places to see and work of cause pertaining to a dream state of conscious. Like Sigmund Freud, but deeper of the soul and mind. Dreams, I remember them rarely, but the ones I do they are always recurring. Pleasant never, nightmarish, no, but in limbo, lost in two places, here and somewhere else. In it, I never have these papers of entry, I'm always caught lost without a home where I feel safe and supported.

Lately, my knee has been acting up, I've been loosing my temper, cussing and masturbating without gaining any pleasure. I am feeling anxious, dark, fulfilled for what I've done so far, but not totally. And this "Painter" word has me furious. I'm at a stage where everyone is suspicious. I don't believe what anyone tells me anyone because, they never follow through. I can't continue with this, I can't because its robbing me of the good things life is suppose to bring. One person can't do everything. I am not here to regret Schiller, I here to remember his work. "Own the World if he wants", Just instill it in the way of the Gods. Future, rhetorical, ostentatious, money, miracle, jackass.

Never interfere brother, talk it over first. You can't see the good side of this, I hoping to dream a future together. If only together is you.

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