Thou Shall Call You

The Creation of Man as Nokia screen display

Cellular etiquette: T&T

1. Enable the loudest ringtone to alert those FREE incoming calls since your phone works only one-way.

2. Hold it as a mike and speak loudly into it.

3. Make it a fashionable vinyl pouch accessory for your wrist, or as neat bulge in your brassiere and dangling holster. Most importantly make it look obvious in public. (I have a phone!...one-way).

4. On your daily routine, always have your head tilted downwards at 45 degree angle. This is necessary to monitor (with an eye glazed look) for those FREE incoming calls or the awful mishaps of missing any calls. " I miss two...who call boy?". Your arm and hand will automatically extend to correspond with this move which can be performed while standing, sitting, walking, driving or at any position what requires not much physical or mental capacities except for the human desire to gossip or to be seen with the latest model phone. The flashier the better. “I get new $49.00 TT cell….call meh nah, It working one-way.”

5. When accepting a FREE incoming call make sure you speak at a decibel level loud enough to annoy those around you.This is an indication that you are a V. I. P standing on the pavement waiting for your red striped Maxi Taxi. “Girl meh taxi reach, wait.. hold nah..I’ll take a window so I can get range”.

6. Try at all cost not to assist anyone who has an expensive phone and needs to use yours matter what. This means they can't make a phone call with their 3 cents credit remaining.

When opportunity knocks......Here are scores costumers standing outside a mobile depot in Port of Spain, Trinidad. Their determination to tolerate the scorching heat for a cellular phone at a price range of a KFC five piece chicken special. (Original please)

Hello Hello Hello! A childhood memory of playing walkie-talkie made from two empty tins strung between with twine.

The 1966, Star Trek science fiction television series which produced the communicator.